A First...Holding Emy

Yep, it's finally here! I walked into Emy's hospital "suite" last Thursday and the doctors had switched her over to the conventional ventilator! I guess the third time IS the charm! I was so surprised! ~Answer to prayer!~ Oh, and no steroids were needed! ~Another answer to prayer~ There are potential side affects of the steroid. Saturday they considered her stable on the new ventilator and gave us clearance to hold her. They call it a "kangaroo wrap". She lies on our chest skin-to-skin and we zip her up in our shirt. The babies really do well when they are held...and it's not so bad for the parents either! Emy really seemed to love it. If you watch the video, you can see that Dustin points out that her numbers show that she is around 100...which means that she's really happy! That number shows the oxygen level in her blood. If it's high she's happy - if it's low she's not! She has quite the reputation around the NICU for setting off her monitor. They like for her to stay between 85 and 100. When the nurses change her diaper, mess with her too much, talk too loud or look at her the wrong way she'll dip below 85 and set off her alarms! We were really surprised she was at 100 while we held her. Happy girl...happy momma!

Criteria to bring her home:

1. Off of the ventilator
2. At least 4 lbs.
3. Feeding well
4. Holding her body temp. well

By the way, she's over 3 lbs! Woo-hoo!!

Still can't thank you enough for your prayers.

Bathtime!

Quick update:

She's gained one whole pound...she's now 2 lbs. 8 oz.! Every ounce counts!

She's still on the critical respirator...haven't held her yet. :o( Her doctor wants to give her a steroid for her lungs after her infection clears up so that she can transition over to the conventional respirator. That's our next big step.

As I've said before on this blog, thank you so much for your prayers. That's what carries us these days.

And Then She Smiled...

Isn't it amazing how God gives you what you need right when you need it? The last week has been a little rough, but today when I went in to see Emy she practically smiled the entire time. It does a momma's heart good to see her baby smile (even if she's not aware that she's doing it). We rejoice in the smallest things these days; small victories, small special moments in time - we are thankful for them all. I thank God for today.

Ups and Downs

Yesterday, the doctors switched Emy to the conventional ventilator. That was a big thing. The last time they tried to switch her things didn't go so great. When I visited her yesterday, she looked really good and seemed comfortable. She seemed to be handling it well but we received a call this morning from the doctor saying that he needed to switch her back to the critical ventilator due to her oxygen levels and the possibility of a collapsed lung.

For the sake of progress I want her to graduate to the conventional ventilator but I have other motives...once she is stable on the conventional ventilator I am allowed to HOLD HER. She's 1 month old and I haven't held her yet. Yesterday, I thought I was just days away from holding her, but things can turn on a dime in the NICU. The highs are high and the lows are low these days.

I thought I learned so many lessons from the trials we went through to get Mia. I was sure that God taught me what He wanted me to learn, but maybe He's still teaching me. There's some reason that we are going through this. Maybe I didn't learn what I needed before. Maybe God doesn't work that way...I don't know. All I know is to be faithful, keep praying and trust that His will for our family is best. He is faithful to us and we will be faithful to Him.

I want to thank all of you for your encouraging words...we feel your prayers.


Get Me Through December - by Alison Krauss

How pale is the sky that brings forth the rain
As the changing of seasons prepares me again
For the long bitter nights and the wild winter's day
My heart has grown cold my love stored away
My heart has grown cold my love stored away

I've been to the mountain left my tracks in the snow
Where souls have been lost and the walking wounded go
I've taken the pain no girl should endure
Faith can move mountains of that I am sure
But faith can move mountains of that I am sure

Just get me through December
A promise I'll remember
Get me through December
So I can start again

No divine purpose brings freedom from sin
And peace is a gift that must come from within
I've looked for the love that will bring me to rest
Feeding this hunger beating strong in my chest
Feeding this hunger beating strong in my chest

Get me through December
A promise I'll remember
Get me through December
So I can start again

Angel Eyes

Sunday was rough for our family. The doctors tried to switch Emy over to a less "critical" ventilator but she didn't respond well to the change and took two steps back so to speak. From what I've read and heard, this is what happens with these little ones; you take one step forward and two steps back. She stopped moving all together - not good. For those of you that have been pregnant, I'm sure you've been told that when your baby is in your tummy if they move too much there may be trouble and if they stop moving there is trouble. Well, this is what happened with little Emy. She just shut down. They switched her back over to the critical ventilator and she recovered, but recovered slowly. It's the saddest thing in the world to see her cry and nothing comes out because of that stinkin' tube. I just sobbed. Dustin's probably wondering where his somewhat rational wife has gone. Emy's crying and I'm crying and Dustin is just wide-eyed & trying to handle it the best way a dad can in these circumstances.

Well, Monday, Tuesday and today have gone really well for little Miss Emy. She's bounced back and is now feeding again. She looked really good today and seemed more comfortable than I've ever seen her. Mia's now in Mother's Day Out twice a week so that I can spend more time at the hospital with Emy. I read to Emy for 30 minutes or so this afternoon. I know that it might not make much of a difference, but it seems as though her monitor readings seem better when I sing or talk/read to her. May just be a mother's wish...

Thanks, Mom, for the above pic.

More updates soon...

The Verdict Is In...

We have a redhead! The nurses on the nightshift placed a little bow in her hair. What a cutie!



Sometimes in pictures Emy appears larger than she really is. So to give you some perspective we unfolded her diaper and placed it in Dustin's hand to show you how tiny she truly is.

One of the families that we've come to know through our NICU visits lost their little boy while we were visiting Emy tonight. Jeremy was 1 lb. 2 oz. and just couldn't hold on any longer. Please pray for them tonight.